When Your "Wait" Becomes Your "Weight"

‍

‍

‍

‍

Happy Monday Girl!

‍

I pray that your day is off to an amazing start. That you are refreshed, rejuvenated, and replenished from the previous week. As I continue to write and create around this month’s theme “The Pursuit of Meaningfulness”, I thought it would be great to incorporate devotions every Monday for the remainder of this month. According to Lauren Miramonti with Global Christian Center, she describes devotions as daily, meaningful interactions between a believer and God. Going to church (or in this case streaming church services) and/or learning from another man or woman of God is always extremely beneficial however, God also desires a personal relationship with us. An every blue moon, do drop in sort of situation is not enough. With everything that is taking place in the world these days it is imperative that we are intentional about our relationship with God.

One thing that I think we don’t fully understand when it comes to the things of God is that God gives us a choice. He provides us with a blueprint that we call the Bible (Book of Instructions Before Leaving Earth) he connects us with Pastors after his own heart but YET, He still gives us the choice to make our own decisions. It’s called “free will.” There is nothing that we can do that will make God love us anymore or any less than he already does and yet, we still pack on things in our life that we believe will make us more appealing to God, but in all honesty, some of the things (not all) that we do is to appeal to other people. We add things to our plate and say it was God, We take on jobs and say they were from God, we marry folks and say God brought them to us, I mean the list goes on and on and truly, all we end up with is a bag full or unnecessary weight, confusion, and uncertainty brought upon by ourselves.

(If you made it this far keep going sis…). Here’s what I think will work, Lord. I just need you to sign off on all of these things, Ok? You may not make this request verbatim, however, some of our actions reflect these sort of requests and when God doesn’t sign off in the time frame in which we desire Him to, we make our own decisions and say that God instructed us to do whatever it was that we wanted to do anyways. Before I go any further, I want to say that I am in no way shape or form trying to make you second guess your faith, question whether or not you hear or heard from God, nor am I trying to tell you whether or not you know God.  I don’t dictate people’s relationship with God because they all look different however, what I am doing is encouraging you to ask yourself this one question: Am I trusting God or am I being foolish? Only you and God know the answer to that. Now that we’ve cleared that up lets keeping going.

‍

What’s something we always quote when we believe we’ve waited on God and POOF! That thing manifested?! “He may not be there when you call but he’s ALWAYS on time” am I right?! So, we say that partially understanding that God has His own sense of timing. ‘With the Lord one day is as a thousand years and a thousand years as one day’ (2 Peter 3:8, AMP). He has perfect timing: never early, never late.God is never in a hurry, but he is always on time. So we know that, we speak that, and still we do things and make decisions out of haste and wonder why we find ourselves in these uncomfortable predicaments. I do believe that some things happen that were meant for our bad but God turned it around for our good on the flip side though, I do believe that we can contribute to our own demise by making decisions in which we truly didn't hear from God to make.

I am reminded of a time when I did just that. Back in 2012, I was working for this company (that will remain nameless) and although the money was spectacular the atmosphere was toxic and hostile. I wanted so bad to get out of that environment. During that time, my husband, then boyfriend, decided to join the merchant seaman and was in school studying for his credentials in Maryland. It was just me with the kids and it was just me financially providing for the household as well. Brandon had saved up three months’ worth of rent and the rest was on me (we agreed to this). I had already been working for the company for about 10 months so I’d say 3 months later I began to search for new jobs. I had a few interviews and that’s where a lot of them stopped.

During that time, I had stopped going to school to work and hadn’t obtained my Bachelor degree and that was a hindrance.Eventually, I interviewed with another company, it was the type of field I wanted to get into but the pay was severely lower then what I was making currently. But it was the job I wanted and so I talked to my husband about it and he supported my decision to proceed with quitting my job for the less paying job. I remember sharing with my husband that "God will honor my efforts as I made a big sacrifice and surely the money will come later" I know now that it was a sacrifice that HE had not asked me to make (inserts face palm). I quit the toxic job and began working for the new company. Not only did the money not come, it STOPPED completely! The company ended up going out of business 4 months later. I had been unemployed for 6 months until another job came around. The job that I was hired for pay was terrible as well, but again,it was the type of job that I wanted and I was desperate. I started that job in July and the company went out of business in October might I add that it was the following Monday after Brandon proposed to me (Major let down).

Now, if you’re anything like me, I don’t believe in coincidences. I made my own decisions TWICE and lost both jobs the EXACT same way. I was unemployed for two years until another opportunity came around and I was a temp for almost a year until they hired me full-time (which is my current job 4 years later). I shared that as I am ALWAYS reminded to never be anxious for NOTHING! I truly do NOT make decisions without being absolutely clear on hearing instructions from the Lord. I carried on the weight of failure, depression, uncertainty, and loneliness in that season all because I chose not to WAIT. Before I leave you to your day and self-reflection, I ask you this? Is it easier to endure the Wait or the Weight?

‍

‍

I pray that you were blessed by today’s devotion. Please leave me a comment, Like, and Share this blog post! I so look forward to hearing from you as well. Have a Great Monday on Purpose.

XoXO,

Angie

‍